i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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