I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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