life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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