I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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