so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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