if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
