Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
