Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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