Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
