Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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