I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
