He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I just want to make out with him forever
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize