it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
