So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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