i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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