if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
