He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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