It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
