just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
wow bdsm is so cute
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
