Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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