So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
