6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
