Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
