YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
