Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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