There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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