and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
