I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize