Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
