im six kinds of drunk right now
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
