So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
