i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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