if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
