I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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