Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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