in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
