Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
It's just like the Real World with babies
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
