and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
