The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
