This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
