Got a toothbrush?
dude i'm inner monologue high
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
