Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
My ass is underappreciated
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
