Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
