I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I believe in your delicious
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
