Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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