Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
