she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
