I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
