the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
The adults are the big ones right?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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