I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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